Bootie and the Blowfish

In the journey to save my body from disrepair after the pending birth of baby number two, I've registered myself for pre/post natal aquafit. I realize that in the grand scheme of things (not to mention the amount of food that my body is ingesting) one evening a week of "mild" exercise, probably isn't enough to do the trick, but it's a start right?

So, as you can imagine, the class is filled with big, ballooning pregnant women, each of us at different stages of our pregnancy. We are all different sizes and have different aches and pains, but we all have one thing in common. We are all uncomfortable in our pregnant skin.

Women, on the best of days, HATE HATE HATE being in a bathing suit in front of other women. And, be honest, ladies, when you see another woman in a their swimwuit you are SIZING THEM UP! It's okay. We all do it. We need to assess other women's flaws so that we feel a bit better about ourselves. Unfortunately there is always that one girl who doesn't have an ounce of cellulite on her body. She's fit and firm. Her boobs are perky, her bum is perfect and her stomach is flat as a board. Even if you're in a room filled with morbidly obese women, if this girl walks in you instantly feel terrible about yourself.

Well guess what?? That girl is in my pre/post natal aquafit class! Now, you may ask yourself, how is there a woman with the body of Gisele in a pre/post natal aquafit class? Trust me...every Friday at 7pm, I ask myself the same question. Now, of course, I don't talk to her (because I'm too busy cursing her in my head) so I have NO idea what her situation is. I did, however, overhear that she has 3 (YES ...I SAID THREE!) kids. Now, how unfair is that?????? AND not only is her body perfect, but she has the audacity to wear a freakin' bikini to class. C'mon lady. WE GET IT! You're hot! Trust me...we're jealous! We all aspire to look like you and none of us will. Don't rub it in our faces. Be nice! We're hormonal! We're stretched to our limits! We all feel like blimps! You're not making it ANY EASIER!

So my question is this: When a course says that it's pre/post natal...how "post" natal can you be to qualify? Obviously the obstetrician recommends that you don't start an exercise routine (not that this is really considered exercise) before your six week post natal checkup...so that's a good starting point. BUT...where does it end? Is my Grandmother a candidate? I mean, she had her last kid 44 years ago, but technically she's still "post" natal, right? But even my Grandmother has the sense to sign up for regular senior citizen aquafit...so what's wrong with this chick? Isn't there a supermodel hot body aquafit class that she can register for? JEEZ!

The one good thing that I take from this experience is that it may really be possible that one can look this good six months after giving birth to a child...So, although I'd love to "slip" on the wet deck of the swimming pool and knock this woman's teeth out, I'll instead use her as a goal to what I would like to look like in 8 months time. No pressure, right?