The Terrible Twos Have Landed...

I thought after 31 months, I was in the clear. But CLEARLY I was wrong about that. I thought I had missed those terrible twos that I'd heard SO much about, but it looks like it was strictly wishful thinking on my part. I'm hoping that the past two weeks have just been a phase rather than a sign of what's to come. I'm sure most mothers can relate to the yelling, crying, whining and straight-up defiance that most kids show at this "wonderful" age...but I wasn't prepared for a constant battle with it. My son's favourite word is no. But if only it ended there. No is usually accompanied by foot stomps and high pitched screaming (usually about a millimeter from my face). This happens at home, at meal times and especially at stores. I'm pretty sure my son hoardes his worst behaviour for long lineups in busy shops where there are lots of people rolling their eyes. And have you ever tried to pick up a tantruming kid? It's like trying to grab a slick eel soaked in oil. I'm not sure how they learn the shark death roll tactic at such a young age, but as soon as a parent grabs them, the arms go up and the body goes rigid. Parents' arms just end up sliding right off. Anyway, I suppose I should just drop my potential purchases and run for the shelter of my car (shelter from those judging eyes), but I just can't bring myself to do it. It's almost a waste of good shopping time (considering that kinda time is few and far between when there are two kids to cart around), so I stick it out, much to the chagrin of those in the lineups around me.

At home we have the naughty chair and the threat of sitting in it USED TO BE great. I would warn once and then the second time the bad behaviour reared its ugly head I would count down from three and by two the behaviour stopped. Lately, I'm not so lucky. Most days there's the potential that my child sits in that chair in the corner of the dining room for half of the day. And of course, all hell breaks loose when he gets there. Screaming, hitting the wall, hitting himself...and then come the tears and the I'm sorries: "Mommy, I'm sorry for hitting", "Mommy, I'm sorry for yelling", "Mommy, I'm sorry for not listening" and of course I hug and kiss him and take him off the chair, and sure enough, he's up to no good minutes later...like he's completely forgotten that he was JUST PUNISHED...

Anyway, I know I'm not the only one out there dealing with this particular challenge, but I'm so curious how one can successfully nip this bad behaviour in the bud before it spirals out of control. Please send me all of your tips, as short of beating my child, I'm willing to try anything.

Okay, so now it's confession time... I've officially finished week number one of my weight loss challenge and how did I do?

1) I didn't curb my eating (Of course this should be number one on anyone's list of things to do to lose weight...but I figure, why curb my eating? I'm exercising and that should be enough, no?)

2) I did Jillian Michaels' 30 Day Shred on Monday, Tuesday and Thursday (half hour of weight training and cardio). Now this is okay...better than nothing, but really I should be doing it more often. I won't even bother giving you excuses. It is what it is and I promise to do better this coming week

3) The proof is in the pudding. Because of my lack of effort on both the food and exertion front, I only lost 0.6 of a pound. Not great. Not good. Not acceptable. Again, I'm going to try better this week. And this is how I'm going to attempt to do it. I'm going to cut my portion sizes and I'm going to make an effort to exercise more often.

Tonight is my first night of kickboxing. Hopefully I don't die, and more so, I hope that it motivates me to get my ass in gear. Jillian Michaels and I will be attached at the remote and we have a date set every night this week with the exception of Wednesday and Friday night (I have to trade her for a date with my two kids....). I'm hoping to do better next week, because at the rate of my current weight loss I'm going to be 55 before I'm back to my goal weight.

So here it is:

Beginning Weight: 148.8 lbs

Current Weight: 148.2 lbs

Goal Weight: 130 lbs

Dream Weight: 125 lbs

Please send me all of your good weight loss vibes. I know I'll need them!

It's Time To Walk The Walk

Okay... it's getting to the point that I can't procrastinate anymore. I talk about it all the time...yet, I sit on the couch and eat my chocolate chip cookies and do NOTHING about it. Now it's time to start...and the straw that broke this camel's back happened this weekend. And straw it was. Literally...a stick...of a woman...I was at a two year old's birthday party and in walks a family with two children in tow. The one child was a little younger than my oldest but I couldn't see the other, who was buried in a car seat under a blanket. A friend of mine leaned over to tell me that the baby was only 2 days older than my youngest. And that's when my eyes veered from the baby straight to the mom. What did this broad look like (hoping that I wasn't the fattest girl in the place). BOY WAS I WRONG!!!!!!!!! This lady was gorgeous...and that's not an exaggeration. She was cute, blond with a stunning hair cut and she was thin. And when I mean thin, she was thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiin...like as a human she was thin...not as a woman who gave birth two months ago thin. She was what every woman wishes they looked like two months after they have a baby or what every woman wishes she'd look like...period.

And that's when I wanted to die. Although no one said anything I KNOW that people were looking at her and then at me, making comparisons...one of these things just doesn't belong here...if you catch my drift. I know if it wasn't me, I'd be making those comparisons too. So, GISELE BUNDCHEN is laughing from her high horse no doubt. There really are women out there who can get their figure back AFTER a kid...even AFTER TWO, and it doesn't take a whole year.

So, what this boils down to is this...I need to lose weight. I've hit this terrible plateau (mainly self induced...with no help from my insatiable appetite and my lack of motivation in the exertion department) of post-baby weight loss and there's nothing left to take the weight off except exercise and a change in my diet. So goodbye Aero bars, adios gummy coke bottles, auf wiedersehen chips and dip, and ciao gelato. Kickboxing officially starts one week tomorrow and what better place to be accountable than online, in front of tens of people. When it's in writing it seems so much more...um...terrible. So, beginning today I will track my weight each week, whether I've lost any or not, for that matter. This is the kick in the pants that I need. Jillian Michaels, her exercise DVDS (including Shred-It With Weights - if interested, please see your local store for these titles...I'm still waiting for "6 Week Six Pack" to come in...) and I will become best friends and more likely worst enemies...but I don't care. I'm tired of these wobbly-jobbly thighs, these sad sack abdominals and my grandma chicken flab arms. I am also tired of talking about how fat I am (as I'm sure everyone around me is equally as repulsed). It's time to do something about it.

Here it is:

Beginning Weight: 148.8 lbs

Goal Weight: 130 lbs

Dream Weight: 125 lbs

Why do I hear Rocky's Theme in my head "trying hard now...getting strong now..." Yes! There I am...running up those steps...I've almost made it...My arms are raising above my head...You can see it too, right?

He's Leaving Home...Bye Bye

As many of you mothers know, yesterday was the first official day of school. Although several of you were overjoyed to finally have some peace and quiet in your household there were many whose children have just left home for a full day for the first time...and this has caused much sadness. As I was taking my youngest out for a walk yesterday, I ran into one of my friends as she was leaving to pick up her kids from school. This woman is another hero of mine, as she has twins and makes raising two for one look VERY easy. Her kids are fantastic, smart, athletic and very well behaved and you can tell they love their mother very much. The feeling is obviously mutual and I knew that she would be a little blue when the two apples of her eye were off to full day school. And I was right. She came out with tears in her eyes, saying that she had thought she was going to be okay, but as the day came closer and closer, she got a little sadder and sadder. I know that it will get easier but I can totally relate...

You may remember waaaaaaaay back when, I was stressing about getting my son into some sort of daycare situation because I was afraid of having to entertain TWO KIDS at the same time. At that point, my husband and I had our little guy enrolled in a part time nursery school program, but were hoping to get a 5 day a week situation with the nursery school or at least getting him into a two day a week FULL TIME daycare program. We were fretting that we wouldn't ever get a placement because the waiting lists were jammed. I got an email yesterday from the director of the nursery school saying that they were going to be discussing the waiting list on Wednesday (today!!!!) to decide who was eligible for the full time program. YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSS...or so I thought. The idea sounds great. One kid all week except for the afternoon when the eldest is spending the majority of the time napping. What could be better, right? WRONG. After really giving it some thought I started panicking. He's already scheduled for two mornings at nursery school a week. Then Nana comes twice a week and watches one so I can play with the other, so that really leaves me with ONE DAY A WEEK to spend with my two kids at the same time. If I put him into the nursery school 5 days a week then I will have NO time to play with him. NONE. Just the weekends...and that's when I have to fight off my husband who is trying to get his time in as he has been kid deprived all week while at work.

So, essentially now I look like a jerk. I've contacted the nursery school AT LEAST four times since we were put on the list to see if there was any movement, if there was a chance we would get a spot...and tomorrow I may get a phone call offering my little guy a full time position! EEEEEEK! I feel like the best thing for me is to decline. Am I crazy? I know that it would benefit my eldest to go to school. He's pretty smart and I can only teach him so much...but I'm obviously also selfish and I want a little time with him. I also wonder if I'm just being spoiled right now. My baby is perfect. She sleeps, she's happy...but once she gets a little older...a little more mobile...will two be a handful? Will I regret my decision? All I know is that if I'm this sad about two half days a week, I can only imagine what kind of a disaster I will be 1) on the first day of full time school and 2) when both my kids go off to university....Good thing I have a couple of years to prepare myself. My heart goes out to all the moms out there that are finding their days empty and quiet. I know it will get easier...but I totally get it.

Let's Get Physical

Well, today is the day. It's my "6 week appointment" at my OB, but technically I have been UNPREGNANT for 8 weeks. Yes, it's been two months! Time is really flying! Two months after Gisele Bundchen gave birth to her magical and perfect baby she looked like this:

I, on the other hand, look more like this:

With 20 pounds left to lose I'm crossing my fingers that my doctor will give me the go-ahead for a rigorous exercise regime. This is the point where I'm extremely jealous of those women who have given birth in the "normal" way. Although I can only imagine the pain and agony you women feel as the baby is crowning (GOOD LORD!), once it's out, you get a couple of stitches, sit in a sitz bath for a week, and you're basically good to go. I know, I know...I'm sure it's worse than I'm making it out to be...but let me wallow in my own self-pity please. With a c-section, it's not that easy...Because I've essentially been severed in half I have to worry about doing damage to my already broken tummy. That's why it's so important to let my belly heal for the entire 6 (or 8 in my case) weeks.

Before a post-natal woman begins to exercise, she must be sure to check if she has diastasis of the rectus abdominis, which is a separation of the main abdominal muscle. Apparently as a pregnant woman gets bigger and bigger, it puts stress on the abdominal wall and if that wall is weak already (as was my case as I had a previous pregnancy and did ZERO exercise afterwards), the uterus can push those muscles further and further apart. On the left is a sketch of diastasis of the belly, on the right is what it is supposed to look like...

Originally, I thought it was pointless to exercise and get back into shape after my first was born. I knew I wanted to have another kid, so it seemed futile to do all that work only to balloon again. Looks like I was VERY wrong! I obviously would've been well ahead of the game if I'd just done some crunches...Anyway, I've been trying to figure out if I have this ailment...but I'm not 100% sure how to check. The internet explains that one is to lie on their back with their knees up, feet flat on the floor. Take one hand and place it on your abdomen, pointing fingers towards the toes, and lift head up while contracting the stomach muscles. If you can fit 3 or more fingers in the space between the two sides, you're in trouble...BUT you have to know what you're feeling for...and I don't (or maybe the space between my two sides is just SO big my hand is getting lost in there!!!)

The reason it's important to figure out if I have diastasis is because one really shouldn't be doing abdominal exercises IF this condition exists. Apparently you have to close up that space before you can do any other abdominal work, or you may risk doing MAJOR damage to those muscles. EEEEEEK! Well, Gisele, the photos don't lie. You obviously didn't suffer from this problem! But the reality is that most women aren't Gisele and more women are like me...right??? Just say yes to make me feel a little bit better, okay? So what happens if a woman does eat the entire Loblaws bakery section for 9 1/2 months and their belly gets a little bigger than they wanted it to? How would one remedy this?

The web does give a couple of exercise ideas to strengthen those transverse abdominal muscles, including planks, back extensions, and the ever exciting (read- disgusting) STOMACH VACUUM!

If those don't work, it's a trip to the physiotherapist to get one's belly in order.

I guess I'll just have to wait and see what the doc says today. Maybe I'll have a stroke of good luck and get the thumbs up so that I can sign myself up for the ass-pummeling cardio kickboxing class..but maybe I'll be looking into sucking it up and sucking it in to get these muscles together before I do anything else.